The Bait Car
I’m no lawyer, but I could have sworn there was a difference between committing a crime outright, and being lured into committing one.
Despite that, law enforcement agencies all over the country have instituted the practice of using “bait cars” to fight rampant car theft.
The idea is simple. Cops modify a nice car—usually an Escalade or other ghetto-irresistible ride—with monitoring devices (cameras) and tracking technology (Lo-Jack). Then they sweeten the deal even more by loading the car up with nice shit, like an iPod and some Luther Vandross CDs. Sometimes, they even leave the keys in the ignition. After that’s done, they drop it off in an area where lots of cars are stolen. And wait.
Needless to say, these are the ingredients for some hilarious ghetto antics. In fact, there’s an entire television show devoted to playing footage of people trying to explain themselves to police before being hauled off to jail. You hear shit like, “I was just moving it out of the way so I could get my car out,” or “this is actually my cousin’s car. He knows all about this.” Of course, they don’t realize we’ve all been watching (and hearing them) steal the car all along. I’ve enjoyed more than a few laughs at these poor idiots’ expense.
But I nearly shat my pants (not in a good way) when, during a routine evening out, I spotted this sign in a parking garage here in LA:
Say what? This shit is real? The bait car instantly went from a playing-in-the-background-type-of-show to some real shit in my life. I mean, however unlikely, I could have conceivably been seduced by the bait, and ended up on the very show whose actors I ridicule. I was shocked and pissed.
Look, I’m all for fighting crime, especially crime that puts my insanely in-demand car in any kind of danger. But, what’s next? Where will it end? A bait twenty bucks falling out of a douchebag’s acid-wash-jeans pocket? A bait just-underage girl? A bait set of answers to the test?
I say that if cops can bait us into committing crimes, we can bait them into thinking they’re fighting crime.
“Oh, sorry Mr. Officer, I didn’t really snatch her purse. Laugh out loud. See, this is Julie, my friend. And we’re just rehearsing for our hipster wannabe-legitimate-theatre play. And, by the way, we were also taping the whole thing. You’re going to be on TV!”
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I would totally watch your show man. I often see the end of the month mad rush to give out tickets to meet some unspoken quota. I would love to install a lap belt in my car and not wear the over the shoulder one just to be able to psych the mo-fo out when he pulls me over.
I totally know where that is!!!!
How about a bait drug deal? I could be selling you some oregano and dried cilantro for your ethnic meal.
Bait car doesnt even catch real car thieves. Leaving an Escalade on street with door open and keys in it should be stolened
. Leave it in my neighborhood and no one would touch it, we’ll all whites here 
actually I would be concerned about it ,call the cops and probably move it off the street. Leaving a nice car locked up in a store parking lot was a good way of catching thievies. But making a big scene like they do now where the woman jumps out of escalade into a car behide it, leaving the escalade with door open and keys in it is damn near intrapment, besides what if a kid jumps in it and plows someone over. they’ll be in trouble with this before long